Survivor Stomach

After I told the below story (and a corresponding one regarding semi-expired salsa) to a friend, she reminded me that I live in Juba and therefore possess a corresponding survivor stomach.

True story. At least I’ve got some good life skills out of Juba cuisine.

So. Recently I went looking for a soda at my parent’s house.  When I perused the options in the fridge, it appeared my only real viable choice was  a caffeine free diet Pepsi.

Delicious and nutritious?

While I was slightly confused as to why my parents had caffeine free anything (what’s the purpose of soda if not for a liquid shot of adrenaline) I figured, what the heck, I’m sort of willing to take what I can get.

So I open it up and take a drink…

Glug glug glu-uhhh...

And pause….


Because it tastes pretty much like drinking liquid tin.

Now, I don’t have much experience with caffeine free things, however I’m pretty sure that is the wrong flavor.  For anything.

I looked at the can again and realized that I was also pretty sure Pepsi no longer made their cans look like that anymore.  In fact, they looked much more like something like this:

The internet confirmed this is the actual current can in use

With a dawning recognition, I tenuously looked at the bottom for the “Drink By” date.

Yes. Yes you read that right.

Yup… yup… Best By August 11, 1997.

Nineteen. Ninety. Seven.

That is FOURTEEN YEARS ago for those bad at math.

Good thing Juba’s taught my stomach to be a survivor.

ETA: I told this story and showed the can to a former coworker of mine.  She pointed out the irony of Pepsi’s claim on the side of the can:

"Same Great Taste"

Really? “Same great taste”?  In the immortal words of Al Borland, “I don’t think so, Tim.”

Don’t think it lasts for 14 years.

Although I do admit that right below it says “For the best taste drink by date on bottom of can,” but still….


One response to “Survivor Stomach

  1. There’s nothing like years of consuming Rolex’s of dubious age for building an iron stomach lining.

    Does that tub of ice cream pre-date the fall of the soviet union? aint no thang.

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